The Messy Ones

My desk is fucking messy. All of the time. Even after I clean it, I still think it would qualify as a car wreck- and that's being polite.The same goes for my closet. And my room. And basically everything in my entire life. 

Strangers may come into my space and think, "How the hell do you find things?" or maybe they'll try to fix it, or even clean it for me. Dear God. Whatever you do- Please. Don't.
Don't be misguided- Just because YOU can't find something in MY mess, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. There is a method and a flow to my disorganization, and to my unique eye, my unique mind, it all makes sense.
I've always had a strong belief that you should walk into a home and know exactly who lives there. It should speak volumes about the character and the personality of the people who inhabit it. I don't mean the best side of that person or the most "instagram worthy" angle.
No- a home is all aspects, all points and edges, painted out in the placement and condition of your pots and pans.
Your space is a physical embodiment of your mind. It should be the place where you can relax and think freely. Your ideal space should motivate your thought process, and never ever distract you from the task at hand. It is but an extension of your mental highway, and should always be changing, moving and adapting as you grow. It is comfort. In whichever way you perceive and define that word.
This is the difference between a house and a home.
For us, the Messy Ones, this may or may not leave our house looking like a pig-sty. It may or may not leave our life looking like a huge lot of tangled twine.
Please don't ask us to change. Either find the path we've made in between the scores and dance shoes and hand-written scribbles, or kindly exit left.
I think that most creative/artistic people tend to be... messy. We're messy in the most literal manner, but also with the way we handle life. A good lot of us are "big picture" people, and the smaller details can sometimes fall to the wayside. Sometimes we don't handle relationships with the best of care. The big picture is "I love you" but sometimes the details, the tact that seems necessary in everyday life, gets lost in the shuffle. 

Here is all that I ask: If you are lucky enough to have a Messy One in your life, try to see things the way that we do. Understand that we won't always bring you flowers. We will always remember your favorite meal. We won't always say "I'm sorry", but we will always show you. We won't always say "I love you" in so many words. But we do. We love you in the best way that we can. We just ask that you try to love us too.

xoxo- a Messy Girl 

My Mary Poppins Carry On

How To Cram Two Month's Worth into a Carry-On

I'm semi-famous for my ability to pack an entire wardrobe in a carry-on. It's my own magic power. Ever since I was little, I used to cram my backpack or purse with everything I could possibly need in case of Armageddon. You just never know man, you need all of your bases covered. Hiking? Covered. Church Gig? Covered. Hippie smoke out? MY RAINBOWS ARE READY.
"You won't be able to fit all that in". Challenge accepted motherfucker. And yes, she really did say that.

I'm going to take all of this stuff... and put it in that little orange carry-on. 

In case you can't take it all in at once, My packing list includes:

• 4 Dresses (2 maxi, 2 regular)
• 2 Maxi Skirts
• 5 Pairs of Shorts (3 Running, 1 Denim, 1 Bike [for under skirts])
• 5 Pairs of Leggings (3 Athletic, 2 Casual)
• 3 Cardigans
• 1 Running Jacket
• 5 T-shirts
• 10 tanks (5 casual, 5 workout)
• 9 bras (7 Sport, 1 Convertible, 1 Strapless)
• 1 Bikini
• 2 belts
• A Scarf
• And a Slew of socks/undies

Let's go team!

Okay, so I kinda lied. We're not taking ALL of that. We have to pick something out to wear for the airport. I'm choosing a thin maxi, a thin tank and a thin scarf. It's drafty on the plane, and hellacious upon landing, so we have to cover all our bases here. Let's put that aside.

Also, just so I don't get comments later, I did buy QUITE A LOT while I was here, and I'm taking a lot of home made jam home, so I do have all of my new stuff and shoes in another bag that I'm going to check in.

So I'm cheating a little bit. Sorry.


 Ok, moving on, here we go.

Roll. It. Up.

The real secret to my methods is rolling-clothes, not doobies. Though that might make packing more fun. I might try it sometime. Back to rolling your clothes- this method prevents wrinkles, and compacts your clothing into the smallest amount of space possible.
I'm going to show you how to do it on a variety of different articles of clothing, and then cramming it all in is super easy.
Start with your densest clothes, and work your way up.

Here's how you do it:


1) Lay it flat. Smooth out all the wrinkles to the best of your ability









2) Fold it in half lengthwise, again smoothing it out as you go.











3)Fold it again, this time horizontally.










4) ROLL THAT SHIT.

Look at you go young grasshopper, we will make you a packing ninja soon enough. Sensei will teach you all.

Now just do that a billion times. Yeah. Just like that- into nice, neat, clean little units. Doesn't that make your little OCD heart flutter with joy? Wait, is that just me?
Okay, cram those into the bottom of your case, and move on to the second densest thing- In this case, my dresses/skirts.
Here we go, same drill, tiny alteration:

1) Lay it Flat

2) Fold it in half, hot dog style.

3) *PLOT TWIST* Take that little tail bit, and fold it in until you have some sort of rectangular shape.

4) Fold it hamburger style.

5) ROLL THAT SHIT! 

I really think this could be like a game show catch line. Like, this is the literal sequel to Baggage. I'd be an awesome host, just saying.
Okay, cram that crap in too. Same side as the leggings.
But there's no way you can do that with an open cardigan. No way.
TRY ME BITCH. (Sorry, packing is a very aggressive situation for me, it take some muscle to cram all this in, if my cursing bothers you, we probably can't be friends. Bye bye.)
LEHGO.

1) Lay it out all pretty. Side-note: I'm in LOVE with this cardigan. I just wanted to proclaim that to the world. 

2) Aww, let that little guy give himself a hug. Right over left, or left over right if you're an anarchist like me. (JK, Hillary 2016)

3) Make it do a crunch.

4) SUSHI ROLL, BABY. Meh, not as catchy.

Okay, so repeat that whole procedure with all of your sweaters/jackets/tees, and cram it in. This should fill one side completely. If you have the little stretchy belty things, buckle that on up, it needs some restraint like Brittney circa 2007. Still love ya Brit.
Take your tanks, and apply the same principle, filling the other side of the suitcase.

Look at how neat and cozy that is!

Now what do we do with this???

Oh Shit. What about my Panties??
Not to fear, you can roll that shit too. Also, don't ever use the word "panties" again. Makes you sound like a pervert instantly.
So I'm going to show you how to fold all of your undergarments, starting with (sorry) panties.
I'm using my bikini bottoms, because it makes me feel better for some reason? It's the exact same thing, but western civilization dictates that one is naughty and one is a-ok for the public eye.
Don't pack these yet, roll them, and put them aside.

1) Lay em out like a bad guy in a Chuck  Norris movie. 




2) Right Hook.







3) Left Hook. 




4) Now here's the different part- take the groin bit, and tuck it into the waist band. Up and over. You've got this man, I believe in you. Tadahhhh, you've got yourself a burrito.
The same tuck and roll works for your sport bras too.


1) Lay it there on its face like a chalk outline.









2) Aww HUGS. 



3) Waist band up to the bunny ears.






4) Tuck em in. Done. 

Pair and roll your socks like you normally would. Not rocket science there.

 So for bra-bras, I just folded one cup into the other. My bras are only lined, not padded, and I would caution you against doing this if you have padded bras, because folding it inward is sure to destroy your crazy-expensive over the shoulder boulder holder. (Victoria's Secret, I'm looking at you). If you LOVE your bombshell, and HAVE to bring it with you, lay it flat.
LAY THESE IN BEFORE YOUR OTHER UNDERGARMENTS!
To keep the cups from getting crushed, stuff the inside with socks and undies.



Your socks, undies, and sport bras, should all be pretty small and compact. Roll up your belts into tiny swiss rolls, and make them itty bitty too. Cram those in wherever you see a gap. Just wherever. Go crazy.

LOOK AT ALL OF THE GLORY!

DUDE YOU DID IT! VIRTUAL FIVE BRO!

 Zip that mother up and you're ready for your flight.
*This does take a little bit of elbow grease, so drink a protein shake and GET AMPED*

 DONE!
Enjoy your trip! 

Or don't, I don't know your life.

Bai Basics, I'm outta hurr.

Esss Party Time

Learn to Make a Pom-Pom Garland with Me!

My roomie and I have been out of AZ for most of the summer, and we're moving back and into our new apartment soon! Once we have all of our crap in order, and our space is habitable, we thought it would be fun to throw a little house-warming party!
Of course, me being the pinterest addict that I am, I took that as an excuse to look at millions of pictures of garlands and balloons, and other cutesy instagram-filtered, fairy light, mason jar projects.
Guys- I fell in love- with a pom pom garland.
Remember how I told you guys that my mom is a hoarder? Yeah. I have tons of yarn at my disposal, just waiting to be molded into something adorable. Something like... I don't know, GIANT POM POMS? What better way to use up some yarn?
My roomie and I aren't sure about the details for the party, or even actually throwing one, but I'm still going to bring this with me and hang it on my door, or over the arch to the hall, maybe? It's too damn cute to refuse, so here you go! I hope you enjoy!

First you have to pick your yarn, and make a template. Out of the yarn I had, I picked out some spring/summer pastels, including Mint (with shimmer), White (with shimmer), Orange Sherbet, Dusty Rose, and Raspberry.  I'll be showing you the first steps on Mint.
For the template, I just used the front of a graham cracker box. Super easy bro.

So once you have the template and the yarn, you're going to just wrap the yarn around the template a bajillion times, and then cut each side. Try to keep your wrapping relatively loose, or cutting the ends is going to be a bitch.

Now that you have the loose bits of yarn all in a bundle, pinch that stack in half, and tie another piece of yarn around the middle. Pull and tie.
Done! Sorta.
You end up with this sad, foppish, Cousin-It wannabe.
You need to give it a haircut.
There isn't any right way of doing it, just trim the ends until you get it as symmetrical and spherical as possible.
Personally, I like the shaggy ones, they look like flowers out of a Suess Book, but it's up to you.

The one on the left is trimmed, the one on the right is not.

 Repeat the process of making Pom Poms until you have the right amount. This is going to vary depending on how long you want your garland to be. I made 11, and that is the perfect size for your standard door jam. Arrange them in an order that suits you, and move on to the attachment.





The next part is probably the most tedious. You have to sew them on the ribbon.
I tried gluing, and stapling, and begging, but this seems to be the only thing that works. Sorry, you just have to do it, but I promise it'll be worth it.

Tadahhhh!

Golden Goddess Gets All the Lads and Lasses

 Racial Ambiguity Really Works in Bars

I wouldn't really call myself a party girl, but since I'm leaving Seattle in the next few days, my friends wanted to take me out to celebrate a bit before I left. She knew the bouncer at this bar who would wave me in as long as I behaved once I got in. Score. 
She told me to get all swanked up, so I went with my go-to party look: Golden Goddess. 
I'm racially ambiguous most days, but play up my eyes and my tan, and people really don't know what to think. In a party situation, this is always a conversation starter.  It's a great way to break the ice without having to say a damn thing. Let my eyes do the talking, so I don't have to worry about stumbling over an introduction. Done. 

All right folks, here we go!
It's Prime Time.

Let's prime that face yeah? I'm using Benefit's That Gal Luminizing Primer, MAC's Studio Moisture Tint in Medium, and Benefit's Boi-ing Concealer in No. 02. I like to mix a pea size amount of the luminating primer into the tinted moisturizer for a more sheer, "lit from within" look. Of course, then use the concealer brush to cover your spots, and move on to step 2.












 This is mainly an eye look, so you're going to need a really great primed eye to pull it off and make it last. I'm using Jordana Eye Shadow Pencils in Nude and Brown, and Benefit's Concealer/ Primer Duo, in Boi-ing No. 02/Lemon Aid.

Pre-Blend

Post Blend

Fill in your brows with the brown eye shadow pencil, then highlight the arch with Lemon Aid. Color the lid and inner corner with the nude eye shadow pencil, paint a triangle under the eye with Boi-ing in No.02.
Bled that sucker out with either your finger, or a soft fluffy concealer brush.

Now that we're primed, it's time for the Peep(er) Show

From Urban Decay's Naked Palette, I'm using Half-Baked, a pretty sheer gold color. Use a fluffy eye shadow brush to swipe that across the entirety of your lid.









From the same palette, I'm using Toasted to smudge into the outer two thirds of my crease, this time using an angled eye shadow brush.








Using a clean fluffy angle brush place the lightest color, Virgin,on your brow bone and inner corner.












Use Creep to line the top lash line, and fill in the outer two thirds of the bottom waterline. Smudge the outer third to connect the top to the bottom.






Wet an eyeliner brush, and dip it into Half Baked. Use this to line the inner half of your eye, and blend it into the black.

Curl your lashes, and use two coats of black mascara. The first is a lighter coat, mainly focusing on length and separation, and the second is for volume.

Yay Your Eyes are Done! Move on to the Rest of Your Face!

Powder your face to neutralize any pigmentation issues your tinted moisturizer missed, and control shine. I'm applying MAC's Sheer Pressed Powder in NC30, with a fluffy retractable kabuki brush manufactured by Eco-tools.

Next, I'm using a duo-fiber polishing brush to apply Benefit's Coralista Blush. It smells like vacation time :)

For that true "Golden Goddess" look, we need bronzer. I'm using MAC's Refined Gold with a dense angled brush, on my forehead, nose, and the hollows of my cheek. 

Finish off with a coat of sheer pink gloss. I'm using Vaseline's lip butter in Sheer Rose. 

There You Have It!

I wore a Black Maxi with cutouts at the bust and back, and a subtle gold leaf earring. I just let my hair just hang out, and do what it does naturally. 

Enjoy!